Poop in our Path

Tammy Davis

Step Over It and Let it Go

“Forget about it.”  “Let it go.”   We tell ourselves these things when we are upset, but it’s easier said than done.   Author and psychologist Archibald Hart says it a little differently.  He advises folks to “step over” a bad feeling or negative emotion.

Dr. Hart might be on to something.  “Forget about it” and “let it go” are vague expressions – things you do in your head.  “Step over it” contains an action verb.

I love to walk my dog in the woods, but sometimes things get in my way – a fallen limb, a fresh ant mound, a pile of dog poop.  When I’m on a trail, I don’t think twice.  I just step over the offending object and continue on my way.

It’s much harder with our emotions.  It’s easy to get thrown off course when a hurt feeling or disappointment gets in our way.   Dr. Hart says we have the ability to break the habit of giving something more energy than it deserves.

We all have piles of poop to avoid.  None of us has a clear path through life.  Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could step over aggravating people the way we step over offensive objects?  Dr. Hart believes we can and should.  He says it’s a choice.

I recently heard a friend give advice as good as Dr. Hart’s.  We were at a party, and everyone was worked up.  My smart friend walked up, heard the ruckus, and softly and sweetly said, “Y’all, let’s just turn the page.”  The simplicity of her comment stunned us all into silence.  She was right.  We could be ticked off or we could turn that page.  We tried our best to heed her words.  It’s not easy, but like anything in life, the more you do it, the easier it becomes.

A lady in my church recently shared a Zen story that gives another good example.   The story goes like this:  Two monks were traveling together. As they were about to cross a stream with a strong current, a beautiful woman asked for help getting across the water.   Even though they had taken a vow never to touch a woman, the older monk carried her to the other side.  After he set her down safely, the two monks continued on their way in silence.  Later that day, the younger monk couldn’t hold his tongue.  “You broke a vow for that woman and she didn’t even say thank you,” he blurted out.  The older monk looked at him and replied, “Brother, I set her down on the other side of the river hours ago, why are you still carrying her?”

Another good visual.  Put down whatever it is that you’ve been carrying.  Just set it down and go on your way.

Life isn’t fair, and there’s no need whining about it.  People are going to be rude.  The poop is going to show up on our path.  There’s nothing we can do about that, but we do have a choice with how we react to whatever comes our way.  We can stew or we can step.  I’m trying to step whenever I can.

Tammy Davis is a local writer.  Visit her website at www.tammydavisstories.com