Chances are you’re being influenced without even knowing it
June 28, 2017By Brian Maynor
We all like to think we’re independent individuals making our own decisions in the world, but in reality most of us aren’t.
In fact, 90% of people actually make choices based on what others want them to do without even realizing it.
Have you ever found yourself agreeing with someone, even though you actually disagree? If so this is an indication that you value the opinion of others over your own. While we all have to do this to some degree in life, we should never let this practice influence major decisions like career, life purpose, whom to love or where to live.
If you’re curious how deeply affected you are by others here are a few ways you can find out:
1. Imagine no one is around to judge or comment on your choices. Would you still be living the same life? Friends and family are important parts of our lives, but we often give them too much power and control. We worry about what they will say, think or feel about what we do because we want their approval. No matter how many times they say, ‘we just want you to be happy’ we never truly believe them. If you imagined yourself living a completely different life, then you need to start making changes now to create that life.
2. Stop relying on someone else’s advice. There is a time and place to seek the advice of others, but most people use it as a crutch or excuse to not think for themselves. Instead spend more time thinking and becoming aware of your own ideas and feelings. Not only will this make you less likely to agree with others, it will help you better articulate them when necessary so you won’t feel embarrassed or ashamed to disagree.
3. Let go of people who get offended when you disagree. It’s hard enough building the courage to speak your own mind, and when someone reacts to it by getting upset or offended it could really shake your confidence. Understand it’s their problem, not yours. Someone who reacts that way to you voicing your opinion doesn’t really like you at all, and you’re better off letting them go.
The most important thing to remember is that there is nothing wrong with having a different opinion, and just because we disagree doesn’t me we’re wrong. It may be hard to express our opinions, but we should always try. That’s the only way to honor them and stay true to ourselves.
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I am always curious to hear from you and what you see in the workplace. Send your questions, comments and pet peeves to [email protected]. Also find each of these storyboards at http://brianmaynor.polyvore.com with links to purchase each item.
About Brian Maynor
Brian Maynor has built a reputation as one of the leading style coaches in the Southeast and is quickly expanding his eponymous company, BRIAN MAYNOR and his FIND, FLATTER & FLAUNT line of image consulting services. A professional with a fresh, upbeat and down-to-earth personality and boundless creative energy, he works frequently with with local celebrities; Fortune 500 companies and nonprofit organizations; modeling agencies; fashion designers; production companies; record labels; media and individuals. A regular contributor to various fashion blogs and online communities, Brian Maynor is one of the most trusted and recognized style experts in the region, utilizing his education and training as a broadcast journalist to serve as a style lecturer, emcee, and commentator for over a decade. He has appeared at fashion shows, expos, and charity fundraisers, as well as events with big brands like Banana Republic, Ann Taylor, Chico’s and Macy’s. His approach is innovative, creative and fashion-forward, balancing fresh, modern styles with classic pieces to keep one’s look grounded. To learn more, visit http://www.brianmaynor.com.