Drive your message home – tips on reading the room

By Brian Maynor

 

We all know communication is just as much about listening as it is talking, and part of that listening has nothing to do with what’s being said.

Successful communicators understand that fact and are very skilled at reading the room and using the information gained to their advantage.  When we are aware of how others are responding to us, we are able to build trust with our audience by modifying what we say to address their needs, hopes, fears, etc. before they may even voice them.

Reading the room is a critical skill we should all develop, but it takes time and practice.  Here are a few tips to help along the way:

1.   Be observant.  Paying attention to our audience is one of the best ways to read the room.  Some powerful cues to be on the lookout for include:  facial expressions, posture and body language.  Staying vigilant is imperative, because the most helpful cues are microexpressions, those spontaneous smiles, raised eyebrows, frowns or furrowed brows, because we have less control over them.

2.    Be engaged.  The best communicators not only control how much they talk, they make their audience feel heard.  It doesn’t matter if their audience is one person or conference room.  By making eye contact, staying in the moment and inviting others to join the conversation are great ways to not only stay engaged ourselves, but also help others feel engaged as well.  Paraphrasing what someone has said is another way to demonstrate our commitment to hearing them and understanding what they are saying.

3.    Use the information.  It doesn’t matter how much attention we pay if we don’t use the information we gain.  It will be crucial when the conversation seems to be stuck or not going the way we hope.  To turn things around try using humor, empathizing with the audience or giving them the opportunity to talk by asking some open-ended questions.

4.    Stay calm.  Energy is power, especially the energy of a group of people, so we have to be aware of it and how we are responding to it.  When the energy is negative, it’s easy to give into it because we’re scared.  No one wants to be the target of negativity.  However, the best speakers are able to keep their emotions in check.  Giving into to fear and anger will only further derail the conversation and escalate the tension.

Reading the room may be an essential skill professionally, but no matter what situation we are in, we should always be aware of how others are responding to us.  This comes naturally to some of us, but luckily it is a skill we all can work on improving.

 

 

I’m always excited to hear from you, so please email your questions, quandaries and conundrums to [email protected].

 

About Brian Maynor

Brian Maynor has built a reputation as one of the leading style coaches in the Southeast and is quickly expanding his eponymous company, BRIAN MAYNOR and his FIND, FLATTER & FLAUNT line of image consulting services. A professional with a fresh, upbeat and down-to-earth personality and boundless creative energy, he works frequently with with local celebrities; Fortune 500 companies and nonprofit organizations; modeling agencies; fashion designers; production companies; record labels; media and individuals. A regular contributor to various fashion blogs and online communities, Brian Maynor is one of the most trusted and recognized style experts in the region, utilizing his education and training as a broadcast journalist to serve as a style lecturer, emcee, and commentator for over a decade. He has appeared at fashion shows, expos, and charity fundraisers, as well as events with big brands like Banana Republic, Ann Taylor, Chico’s and Macy’s. His approach is innovative, creative and fashion-forward, balancing fresh, modern styles with classic pieces to keep one’s look grounded. To learn more, visit http://www.brianmaynor.com.

 

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