How to help a struggling colleague
October 17, 2018
By Brian Maynor
If motivating ourselves can be a challenge, think about how hard it can be to help motivate a colleague.
If you’ve ever played or watched team sports, then you know everyone wins or loses together, and when a player is having an off day the entire team pitches in to help them out. They aren’t banished and sent to sit on the bench, because as a team they are all invested in each other.
That same camaraderie should also apply at work. Whether they are formal or not, we all work as part of a team, and when a colleague is struggling to stay focused, productive or engaged we should all pitch in to help them.
Here are a couple of ways we can lend a hand the next time we see someone struggling:
1. Acknowledge the situation. Before we jump in and start helping out, we should first talk to them and let them know we’ve noticed their struggle. This should be done compassionately, maybe even away from the office. If it’s a struggle to find the right words, the best bet is to just share with them what we’ve observed.
While we can’t force them to open up and share details about their situation, by acknowledging the fact we’ve noticed a change will show we are paying attention and invested. And who knows, this conversation could be all they need to regain their footing and get back on track.
2. Validate the struggle. Sometimes acknowledgment isn’t enough and we have to go one step farther and validate the difficulty in being productive. We live in a challenging, competitive and connected world, and that means the pressure from imposter syndrome and social comparison is greater than ever.
By sharing our struggles and challenges, we can help them feel less alone and that it’s okay to have off days. Imagine if we had only social media as a reference point? Everyone would have some kind of inferiority complex.
3. Make a plan. Well-meaning conversations are great, but they aren’t necessarily productive without formulating a plan in the process. If we have some ideas in mind before starting the conversation, that will go a long way to prevent the talk from turning into a gripe session.
Whether it’s providing help with small steps to increase their productivity or realigning their vision on the forest instead of the trees, helping someone feel empowered to accomplish even a small task will boost their motivation and snowball into accomplishing bigger tasks. Remember the best way to climb a mountain is one step at a time.
Helping a colleague who is struggling or off their game doesn’t mean we jump in and solve all of their problems. It just means being a considerate teammate who is willing to take the time to acknowledge the situation, validate the struggle and help them formulate a plan of action. Not only will we both feel better afterwards, we just may need them to return the favor one day.
I’m always excited to hear from you, so please email your questions, quandaries and conundrums to [email protected].
About Brian Maynor
Brian Maynor has built a reputation as one of the leading style coaches in the Southeast and is quickly expanding his eponymous company, BRIAN MAYNOR and his FIND, FLATTER & FLAUNT line of image consulting services. A professional with a fresh, upbeat and down-to-earth personality and boundless creative energy, he works frequently with with local celebrities; Fortune 500 companies and nonprofit organizations; modeling agencies; fashion designers; production companies; record labels; media and individuals. A regular contributor to various fashion blogs and online communities, Brian Maynor is one of the most trusted and recognized style experts in the region, utilizing his education and training as a broadcast journalist to serve as a style lecturer, emcee, and commentator for over a decade. He has appeared at fashion shows, expos, and charity fundraisers, as well as events with big brands like Banana Republic, Ann Taylor, Chico’s and Macy’s. His approach is innovative, creative and fashion-forward, balancing fresh, modern styles with classic pieces to keep one’s look grounded. To learn more, visit http://www.brianmaynor.com.
