Is it really “all good”?

By Brian Maynor

 

If we counted, how often would we catch ourselves saying everything is “all good”?

Personally I hear myself saying it out of habit, when I don’t want to really talk about what’s going on, or more appropriately what’s going wrong, with my day.  It’s just easier to brush it under the rug for the time being.

While this is primarily a social response, sometimes it can be hard to see the good in people, places or situations when they aren’t meeting our expectations.  In these moments, we need to look deeper to find the inherent goodness in everything.

It may sound a bit touchy-feely, but seeing the inherent good in things is important not only to happiness, but also success.

If we get caught up in looking at the negative, not only do we become jaded, unhappy people, we also lose the ability to relax, enjoy everything we have going on and say ‘yes’ to opportunities that come our way, which is the starting point to success.

The key to breaking this cycle of negativity is to practice unconditional acceptance.  Here is a breakdown of what unconditional acceptance means and how to practice it:

1.   What is unconditional acceptance?  The idea of unconditional acceptance sounds scary, because most of us think it means the act of not changing the things in our lives we don’t like.  Not only is this not the case, this fear is based on the physical aspects of life, whereas unconditional acceptance is based deeper within the core reason for action; where lasting change is made.

2.    The paradox.  When we sink into this deeper experience, not only are shifts and changes easier to make, we actually find fewer things we want to change.  From this perspective we are able to broaden our view of life, and appreciate every aspect of it, even the negative parts.  When we see areas we want to change, it is easier to make shifts and adjustments because we are able to adjust root causes instead of simply chasing different results.

3.    Embrace the stillness.  We live in a very goal-oriented society, which carries with it the expectation of constantly staying busy.  The drawback is that to really develop unconditional acceptance we need to slow down and disengage from the busywork of life.  Only when we stop are we able to let go of our preconceived notions, ideas and agendas and settle into the space of unconditional acceptance.

Existing in a space of unconditional acceptance not only helps us make longer-lasting change in our lives, it can also help us better endure life’s setbacks, frustrations and disappointments.  When we embrace ourselves for who we are, where we are, and what we want from our lives the next time we say, “it’s all good” we can really mean it.

 

I’m always excited to hear from you, so please email your questions, quandaries and conundrums to [email protected].

 

About Brian Maynor

Brian Maynor has built a reputation as one of the leading style coaches in the Southeast and is quickly expanding his eponymous company, BRIAN MAYNOR and his FIND, FLATTER & FLAUNT line of image consulting services. A professional with a fresh, upbeat and down-to-earth personality and boundless creative energy, he works frequently with with local celebrities; Fortune 500 companies and nonprofit organizations; modeling agencies; fashion designers; production companies; record labels; media and individuals. A regular contributor to various fashion blogs and online communities, Brian Maynor is one of the most trusted and recognized style experts in the region, utilizing his education and training as a broadcast journalist to serve as a style lecturer, emcee, and commentator for over a decade. He has appeared at fashion shows, expos, and charity fundraisers, as well as events with big brands like Banana Republic, Ann Taylor, Chico’s and Macy’s. His approach is innovative, creative and fashion-forward, balancing fresh, modern styles with classic pieces to keep one’s look grounded. To learn more, visit http://www.brianmaynor.com.