The Impression Matrix
June 14, 2016By Brian Maynor
We all get nervous before a presentation, interview or starting a new job, particularly if we feel in over our head.
This is completely normal, and the most common coping technique used to handle these nerves is the ‘fake it till you make it’ approach, which includes power posing or mantras for a little jolt of confidence. The power behind this method is that it actually shifts our hormone levels and increases testosterone and lowers our cortisol. It’s not just service level or a placebo effect.
While this is great news, that we can actually create real change through this practice, it is important to remember it takes more to master these situations than just our manipulating our own hormone levels. Communicating confidence is about how we connect with our audience, and that is where the impression matrix comes into play. Opinions are based on a ratio of how much we like someone versus how we respect them.
Here are some examples of techniques that will work on both sides of this scale delivering maximum impact on both warmth and competence:
1. Smile and Engage. When we’re nervous or anxious, it’s easy to adopt a ‘bitchy resting face’ and avoid eye contact because we’re so focused on what we’re going to say, how it will be received and just getting through the moment without throwing up. But those emotions don’t translate to the audience or engender acceptance. Even if it takes all you have to hold yourself together, you need to smile and connect with them through eye contact. Being nervous is understandable. Saying you’re nervous is relatable. Embrace it, vocalize it then let it go.
2. Posture. Whether you’re sitting, standing or walking carrying yourself with proper posture will not only help you feel more confident, but it helps the audience accept your professionalism and authority. When we slouch we not only demoralize ourselves we allow the audience to discount us, and what we have to say. Along with conveying power, poise and pride, standing tall with our chest high helps us feel less guarded and able to focus on our goals with more conviction.
3. Breathe. Thankfully this is an autonomic function, because as anyone who has ever given a presentation knows it’s the last thing you’re thinking about. By shifting your awareness, especially at the beginning, to slow deep breaths, you give yourself time to adjust to the situation and more oxygen, which help curb the fight or flight syndrome.
Feeling powerless is often the root emotion behind nerves, which is why we seek ways to boost our confidence to feel in control. However, making a good impression isn’t all about mastering our own emotions. The way we deliver our message is just as important to the audience because it affects the opinions they form. Audiences need to see more than just confidence and pride in order to have a favorable impression. They need to see warmth and authenticity as well. Fortunately you can portray both with a few simple techniques.
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I am always curious to hear from you and what you see in the workplace. Send your questions, comments and pet peeves to [email protected]. Also find each of these storyboards at http://brianmaynor.polyvore.com with links to purchase each item.
About Brian Maynor
Brian Maynor has built a reputation as one of the leading style coaches in the Southeast and is quickly expanding his eponymous company, BRIAN MAYNOR and his FIND, FLATTER & FLAUNT line of image consulting services. A professional with a fresh, upbeat and down-to-earth personality and boundless creative energy, he works frequently with with local celebrities; Fortune 500 companies and nonprofit organizations; modeling agencies; fashion designers; production companies; record labels; media and individuals. A regular contributor to various fashion blogs and online communities, Brian Maynor is one of the most trusted and recognized style experts in the region, utilizing his education and training as a broadcast journalist to serve as a style lecturer, emcee, and commentator for over a decade. He has appeared at fashion shows, expos, and charity fundraisers, as well as events with big brands like Banana Republic, Ann Taylor, Chico’s and Macy’s. His approach is innovative, creative and fashion-forward, balancing fresh, modern styles with classic pieces to keep one’s look grounded. To learn more, visit http://www.brianmaynor.com.
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