Why do we continue doing something when we know it’s not good for us?

By Brian Maynor

 

We all have bad habits.  It’s impossible to live and be human without having them, but have we ever stopped to think about why we keep doing something knowing it’s not good for us?

Most often, the answer is ‘no.’

It doesn’t matter if the bad habit is smoking, excessively drinking, eating junk food, biting your nails or picking your nose, the fundamentals are the same.  Habits are created because of the feelings they give us more so than the action itself.

Here are a few reasons bad habits seem to be irresistible:

1.   They comfort us.  Personally I know I tend to bite my nails when I’m stressed, but never connected the element of comfort and sense of control associated with the two, but it makes total sense.  Every action we take has a purpose associated with it, even if we’re not consciously aware of what that is, and most often it is an attempt to find comfort.  Since our brains are designed to be reward-based, when we engage in a bad habit our brains release dopamine so we associate the bad habit with feeling good and crave more of it.

2.    Everyone else is doing it.  As a master rationalizer I am very familiar with this concept, but we all use it, especially when they’re generally accepted by social convention.  If everyone else is doing it then chances are we’re going to do it too.  (Sorry moms.)  These justifications are generally motivated by guilt, because we know we’re not making the best choice and are reaching for a sliver of validation.

3.    Replacing the bad habit with a positive one.  Breaking any habit is hard, but if we ever hope to do it we need three things:  mindfulness, commitment and consistency.   Mindfulness helps us identify our triggers, which is especially important for unconscious habits.  Commitment is the glue that makes change possible, through consistency.  It will be work at first to make a new habit, but the good news is it does get easier.

Generally it’s not the habit itself that keeps us going back for more, but the feeling we have associated with the habit.  Transferring those feelings to another habit is essential if we want any hope of breaking a bad one.

 

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Click here or on the images below to learn more about the outfit.

 

I am always curious to hear about your weekend wardrobe dilemmas and help make your work wardrobe pull double duty.  Email your questions, quandaries and conundrums to [email protected].  Also find each of these storyboards at http://brianmaynor.polyvore.com with links to purchase each item.

 

About Brian Maynor

Brian Maynor has built a reputation as one of the leading style coaches in the Southeast and is quickly expanding his eponymous company, BRIAN MAYNOR and his FIND, FLATTER & FLAUNT line of image consulting services. A professional with a fresh, upbeat and down-to-earth personality and boundless creative energy, he works frequently with with local celebrities; Fortune 500 companies and nonprofit organizations; modeling agencies; fashion designers; production companies; record labels; media and individuals. A regular contributor to various fashion blogs and online communities, Brian Maynor is one of the most trusted and recognized style experts in the region, utilizing his education and training as a broadcast journalist to serve as a style lecturer, emcee, and commentator for over a decade. He has appeared at fashion shows, expos, and charity fundraisers, as well as events with big brands like Banana Republic, Ann Taylor, Chico’s and Macy’s. His approach is innovative, creative and fashion-forward, balancing fresh, modern styles with classic pieces to keep one’s look grounded. To learn more, visit http://www.brianmaynor.com.

 

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