Why is it easier to make decisions for someone else?
December 4, 2018
By Brian Maynor
No matter the dilemma, why does it always seem easier to solve when it’s someone else’s?
When someone asks for our advice or help it doesn’t matter whether it’s going after a new job opportunity, asking for a promotion or starting a new relationship the best answers seem to come to us with ease, requiring little effort or examination. However, when we are the ones facing the same dilemmas we often struggle with uncertainty and indecisiveness.
It’s a little comforting to know everyone experiences this phenomenon, and the reason is pretty simple: we are a lot more adventurous when it comes to other people than we are ourselves. Not only are we more adventurous, we are also willing to act with more certainty using less information.
A recent collaborative study by the University of Wisconsin, East China Normal University and Normal University in China examined this situation and found that not only do we make different choices when deciding for someone else, but the way we make those choices is different as well. Here is more about what they found:
1. The different ways we make decisions. The study found that when we make decisions for ourselves we tend to focus on the minute details, but when we make decisions for others we are more focused on the big picture.
2. The resulting mindsets. When we are making decisions for ourselves, focusing on the minutiae puts us in a cautious mindset. That means we are more reserved, risk adverse and deliberate in our choices.
When we’re making decisions for someone else, we are looking at all, or more possibilities, putting us in an adventurous mindset. We also tend to spend less time dissecting and analysis specific options in favor of exploring as many options as possible; the more novel the better.
3. The results. Having an adventurous mindset means we’re more creative and able to think outside the box better for others than we are ourselves.
4. The bottom line. When we’re making decisions for other people, we are inspired. This means we engage in a more of a free-flow assessment, with less judgment, second-guessing and over thinking. We tend to focus more on positive information and imagine favorable outcomes when deciding for others resulting in ideas and choices that are more optimistic and action-oriented. Contrast this to when we’re making decisions for ourselves and we tend to focus on worst-case scenarios and doubts.
5. The take away. Now that we have this information studied and quantified, we should all bounce ideas off of a confidant we trust to give us their honest and blunt opinion, and try to remove ourselves mentally from our decision making process.
While we may not want to have others making all of our decisions for us, it’s a good idea to seek input from others before making any major ones.
I’m always excited to hear from you, so please email your questions, quandaries and conundrums to [email protected].
About Brian Maynor
Brian Maynor has built a reputation as one of the leading style coaches in the Southeast and is quickly expanding his eponymous company, BRIAN MAYNOR and his FIND, FLATTER & FLAUNT line of image consulting services. A professional with a fresh, upbeat and down-to-earth personality and boundless creative energy, he works frequently with with local celebrities; Fortune 500 companies and nonprofit organizations; modeling agencies; fashion designers; production companies; record labels; media and individuals. A regular contributor to various fashion blogs and online communities, Brian Maynor is one of the most trusted and recognized style experts in the region, utilizing his education and training as a broadcast journalist to serve as a style lecturer, emcee, and commentator for over a decade. He has appeared at fashion shows, expos, and charity fundraisers, as well as events with big brands like Banana Republic, Ann Taylor, Chico’s and Macy’s. His approach is innovative, creative and fashion-forward, balancing fresh, modern styles with classic pieces to keep one’s look grounded. To learn more, visit http://www.brianmaynor.com.
