Columbia Closings

By Tom Poland

 

What’s Not In Columbia Anymore—Useful, Insightful, Delightful

When the Internet exploded it opened a door to all sorts of local websites that prove useful and insightful. One site, “Columbia Closings,” serves up histories and highlights of restaurants that were here one day and gone the next.

Restaurants come and go. That’s a fact. Some you’re glad to see ’em fold. You know, the ones with slack management, sorry service, and nasty restrooms. Others break your heart when they close. Despite their great food and service they fall victim to a host of ills and close without warning. When Hops closed on Harbison, regulars suddenly had nowhere to go. Some give notice they’re closing; others don’t. A “cold closing.” You hear stories about the staff showing up only to find they are out of work. No warning at all, though if you read on, you’ll see ways to spot a sinking ship masquerading as a failing restaurant.

Those of you who have gone to your favorite restaurant only to see the lights off and doors locked will enjoy Columbia Closings. You just might find your restaurant there. Here’s its mission statement:

Here’s the deal: This blog is (mostly) about businesses in Columbia, SC, which have closed.

How often have you gone to a favorite store or restaurant and found the doors locked and all the tables and chairs stacked against the back wall? Did you wish there were a place to vent about it, say how you saw it coming, or give the inside scoop on what happened? I’d like this to be that place.

As I notice businesses that have closed, I’ll post entries on them. If I was a patron, I’ll post a few thoughts, if I wasn’t, I’ll just note the passing. I hope that you, should anyone actually find this blog, can fill in the details with your comments.

In general, this blog will deal, as the title suggests, with Columbia SC. I also won’t hesitate to make “remember when?” posts about places that closed years ago.

I stumbled across Columbia Closings while doing a bit of research. What a find. In no time at all I was looking up old restaurants now in history’s dustbin. I searched for places like Luigi’s Italian Kitchen that sat at 1215 Augusta Street in the late 1970s to mid-1980s and there it was. I remembered its red-and-white checkered tablecloths and Chianti bottles that held candles oozing wax. Chianti bottles hung from the ceiling too and on the front door was a sign, “No Plastics.” (Nice!)

I found the Elite Epicurean. It pleased many at 1736 Main Street, including a blonde model who held it in high regard. It generally attracted a clientele with a bit of class. Then again, its heyday was an era when people displayed a bit more polish than today. A popular entrée by the way was Island of Scorpios Shrimp.

While Columbia Closings focuses on restaurants, it lists other businesses that closed their doors. The restaurant theme yields two helpful pages: Ted’s Rules For Restaurants and Signs Your Restaurant Is About To Close.

Anyone who owns, manages, or provides service should read Ted’s Rules. Consider Rule No. 4:

Don’t Bring the Bill While I Am Still Eating

If you bring the check before I have finished my meal, it implies that you want to get rid of me, and is somewhat rude. It also implies that you are washing your hands of me, and that I can expect no further refills. It is also not in your best interests. If I have been contemplating dessert, having a finalized bill pretty much kills the chance that I will ask for anything else.

And Rule No. 6 is a good one too.

Never Ask: Do You Need Change?

If I have a check for $8.21 and hand you a $20 bill and you say, “Do you need any change?” it implies you are angling for a $11.79 tip. It’s even worse if what I would be getting back is close to (but more than) what I would be leaving you for a tip. In that case it makes me feel stingy for begrudging you an extra eighty cents.

The correct phrase is “I’ll be right back with your change.” This gives me the opening to say “That’s OK” if I intend you to keep everything.

So, what are some signs your favorite restaurant is closing. Consider these:

The Hours Change

This is a big one. If the place was formerly open on Sunday, but now isn’t, if they used to do lunch and supper but now do only lunch, if they used to be open until 10 p.m., but now close at 8, these are all bad signs.

They Are Out of Something Mundane

If you go and they are out of something completely mundane and off the wall, like napkins, or salt, that is a very bad sign.

The Staffing Level Drops

If your favorite waitress is gone, and she has not been replaced, that is a bad sign. If there was a hostess and now there is not, that is a bad sign.

The Menu Changes

If the items that take more work to prepare, or which fewer people order, vanish from the menu, that is another bad sign. If your favorite place starts to exhibit one or more of these signs, well, enjoy it while you can.

One commenter added a good tip off: “If you eat fried foods at your favorite restaurant and their flavor starts to change noticeably, it may be a sign that the oil in the fryer is being changed less often. This is a bad sign, and usually indicative of a vicious circle (food quality deteriorates, meaning fewer repeat diners, meaning less revenue, meaning more skimping on expenses, meaning fewer oil changes, meaning food quality deteriorates …)”

Another nice touch the website serves are photos of places that have closed. I was hoping to see photos and information on a St. Andrews icon, Herb’s Grill, but it was missing. I may have to write it myself. Even with this great place missing, Columbia Closings is well worth a visit. For those of you who have been around Columbia a long time and remember great restaurants that are no more take a trip down memory lane by visiting Columbia Closings.

Columbia Closings. It has a ton of great information and memories. It just has one shortcoming. I could not find a way to contact its founder, Ted. Was hoping to run things by him.

 

 

 

Visit Tom Poland’s website at www.tompoland.net
Email Tom about most anything. [email protected]

Tom Poland is the author of eight books and more than 700 magazine features. A Southern writer, his work has appeared in magazines throughout the South. The University of South Carolina Press has released his and Robert Clark’s book, Reflections Of South Carolina, Vol. II. The History Press of Charleston just released his book, Classic Carolina Road Trips From Columbia. He writes a weekly column for newspapers in Georgia and South Carolina about the South, its people, traditions, lifestyle, and changing culture.

 

 

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