Take me to the closest Subway

By Jeff Becraft

 

On Saturday, I was on my way back into town on I-77. I was really tired. I pulled into the parking lot of this one burger joint, found a tree, parked my car in the shade, rolled the windows down and sat back for 20 minutes.

That was about lunchtime but I was really not in the mood for a burger. I wanted a sub sandwich. And so I wanted to find a Subway, which is one of my favorite places.

Now, normally I could find Subways a dime a dozen on an interstate. I get back on the interstate and I am heading south. And I say to my GPS… on my smartphone, “Take me to the closest Subway.”  To which my GPS… that is part of my smartphone replies, “You have several options. Which one would you like?” and shows me this map.  Now, I am driving the car… on an interstate… if I could take time to focus on a tiny map, I wouldn’t have talked to the GPS to start with.

So I just say back, “The closest one.” The GPS actually responds. (You would have to know the history of my conversations with my GPS to understand my surprise.)  I now have this route in front of me that is taking me to the closest Subway.

When I get off the exit, I miss the road I was supposed to take (I didn’t see any Subway sign and I misunderstood what the GPS was saying… imagine that). So I just figured I will go down to the next stoplight, make a left and I’ll circle back around where the Subway is. My GPS… that is part of my smartphone… takes me three quarters of a mile down a dead-end road. Now, on this dead end road I passed several apartment complexes that I could have turned around in any one of them.  But no… it takes me three quarters of a mile down a road and then at the end of this dead end road tells me to make a U-turn.

And so I make the U-turn. I come back the three quarters of a mile. I then follow the directions from that point on and it takes me to the closest subway which is in a Walmart.  And in that part of the country, the Saturday before July 4^th, being at Walmart is the thing to do. The parking lot is totally jam packed.  I do find a space and I get out of the car and walk in.  Right as I get into the door I look to the right and there is Subway… but it is closed.

So I walked back to my car, get in my car, and get back on I-77 and head down the road. Once again, I say to my GPS… that is part of my smartphone, “Take me to the closest Subway.” Well, it keeps wanting to take me back to the Subway that is closed. Now, how smart is that?

So I finally give up on asking directions. I am now just going to look for the blue signs along the highway. When I see one that says “Subway”, I’m taking that exit. So I go down the road. I see a blue sign that has a Subway on it. I say to myself (no point in talking to my GPS anymore), “That’s me right there.”

I get off the interstate. I go in a pretty old gas station where the Subway is. I go in the bathhouse first before getting into line. The bathhouse looked like it hadn’t been cleaned in 50 years and there was no soap in it. I come out. There’s a line of six people for Subway. One of the people working is a guy and I’m thinking, “Well, I know which bathroom he’s used.” And I say to myself (my GPS and I are no longer on speaking terms), “No, I’m not doing this one… and I don’t want to wait in line.”

So I get back in the car. I’m going to go down the highway until I get my next blue sign with a Subway. It is about 10 miles down the road. I know about this exit.  I have stopped there before because it has a Subway at a truck stop. I get some gas just so I can keep my car in the shade.

I go in and there’s a lot of people… but I get into line for a few seconds. I’m not really interested in standing in line but this is my third stop.  One of the workers who’s working behind the counter is coughing and looks like they don’t feel very well. I say to myself, “That’s it. I’m out. That’s three tries. I’m out.”

Now, I understand shooting off fireworks for the 4^th of July and all that, but you would think that someone could shoot off some fireworks on July 1 for ornery people like me to find a Subway on the interstate where I don’t have to stand in line.

 

Jeff Becraft is the Interim Director of Our Place of Hope and the Director Emeritus for Youth Corps and has dedicated much of his life to helping shift the vision of people’s lives. Youth Corps is a life-changing leadership development experience that inspires high school students to be leaders in the Midlands and beyond. You can connect with Jeff at  [email protected].