Those who influence us

By Jeff Becraft

 

It is interesting how we can influence one another.  (Interesting is really not the word… it is deeper than that.)  But someone who has greatly influenced my life is a friend and mentor of mine named Wynn Lembright.

When I came out of college, I joined the staff of FCA.  I was in Virginia with Mark Newlen.  At 22 years old, I was one of the youngest guys in the nation out of the 150 staff members.  Wynn was our regional director.

The thing is, I really wasn’t around Wynn all that much.  Not too long after I arrived, Wynn had to move on to another job.  Other friends like Mark and Greg were around him much more.  But still… Wynn had a huge impact on my life.

I was an odd mixture of brashness and outspokenness along with a deep insecurity (depending on what the situation was).  Another friend, Rick Nielsen, who has had his own influence on my life in these later years once said to me during those early years, “Becraft… we need to get you to loosen up so people see what you are really like.”

Wynn was a stabilizing and encouraging influence… I think for all of us.

Wynn is one of the wisest people I have ever met.  And yet, he never came off as pretentious or “Hey, listen to me…”  In any given situation, he had the most wisdom in the room but he left you feeling like you were the most important person in the room.

Wynn played a major role in Brenda and I being married.  All the northeast staff were together for a regional staff meeting and I was riding in the car with Wynn somewhere in the Philadelphia area.  Brenda and I were dating and I was describing to him a recent situation where I had communicated to Brenda that I thought we should take a break for a little while… but it wasn’t going the way I had hoped.

“So you want things to go on like you are friends?” Wynn asked me.

“Yeah,” I replied.

“You can’t do that,” Wynn responded.

“Why not?” I asked.

“You have already invested too much emotionally.  You can’t go backwards.”

And just like that, at 22 years old, in a short car ride with Wynn, I knew I was either going to spend the rest of my life with Brenda or I wasn’t.  I knew Brenda was the type of woman I wanted and I so respected her character and who she was.  I just needed a little wisdom from someone older than me.  Brenda and I have now been married 38 years.

Back in 2019, Wynn knew we were all getting older and he wanted to get together with some people who had been part of his life and see them again.  So, Wynn, Mark, Steve, and I got together for a weekend in Virginia at Graves Mountain Lodge.  All three of these guys had had a profound impact on my life.  It was truly an honor to see them and be with them and be able to tell them how much they had influenced me.  What I learned from them and saw in them, I have implemented in my own life all these years.  That weekend came at an important time in my life and that time with those guys has meant a great deal to me.

Even though I have not physically been around Wynn very much in my life, he has walked with me through the good, the bad, and the ugly.  Every once in a while, Wynn would shoot me an email in a typical Wynn fashion – very simple, very short, very gentle, and very profound… something that would be very encouraging to me.

Wynn is now battling pancreatic cancer.  Even in this dark valley, he remains faithful and loyal to his God, his family, and his friends.  We would greatly appreciate your thoughts and prayers for Wynn and his family.

So, Wynn, this is for you.  I am thankful for you in my life and the positive influence you have had on me.  There are many people’s lives that are different today because of your life.  May we continue to humbly love those around us like you have.

 

Jeff Becraft is the Director of Our Place of Hope and the Director Emeritus for Youth Corps and has dedicated much of his life to helping shift the vision of people’s lives. Our Place of Hope is a paradigm shift for people living with mental illness that encourages them to regain meaning, purpose, and hope for their lives. You can connect with Jeff at  [email protected].