Deborah OConnor June 4, 2013

People do business with those they know, like and trust. They will go out of their way to deal with someone if they know that they will be treated well. People that maintain a culture of respect, tolerance, goodwill and professionalism are always sought out. There is no doubt that your manners, behavior, and how you carry yourself in business situations determine your success or failure. Your ability to communicate effectively with others is vital to your business success. If you don’t have strong social skills and manners, you won’t get far in business. You need confidence and poise and the ability to make those around you feel comfortable. Knowing proper etiquette gives you an aura of self-assurance that cannot be faked and those around you will always sense it.

Etiquette gives you the power and presence to know what to do in most business situations. From introductions to table manners to business card exchanges to knowing the rules of introductions, you will appear confident and self-assured. When you conduct yourself confidently in these situations, you always impress. You set yourself apart from the your competition and come across as someone with poise and intelligence.

Good business etiquette speaks volumes and raises the bar for anyone who takes the time to learn it. Remember, those who play by the rules succeed. You will increase your business steadily because people want to deal with you. If you don’t make an effort, business opportunities simply won’t come your way. Wouldn’t you rather deal with someone who is polite, knowledgeable, and confident?

If you are still not convinced that the power of etiquette is real, think about this. Most people won’t really notice if you eat properly, use the correct utensils, and have good table manners. But I guarantee you they will notice if you put your roll on their plate, drink out of their wine glass, spill on the tablecloth, wave your utensils around while you are talking, speak with your mouth full, blow on your soup, or cut your meat up into little pieces. They will definitely notice if you invade their personal space, shake their hand like a gorilla, introduce people in the wrong order, or spill your red wine on your tablemate.

Good professional manners pay off.  There is the famous true story about a gallant gentleman who noticed a bug in his salad.  The horrified hostess also noticed it at the same time, and to spare her a public embarrassment he discretely ate the insect and said nothing about it.  Years later the grateful hostess rewarded the gentleman for his chivalry by leaving him a substantial sum of money. This probably will not happen to you, but you get the idea.

There is no substitute for proper manners and etiquette. And please remember that manners trump etiquette every time. By this I mean that it is very poor manners to correct someone that has a breach of etiquette. I have seen someone berate a tablemate for eating grapes improperly (yes, there is a proper way to eat grapes). The berater was guilty of poor manners, which was imminently worse than eating grapes improperly. Take the time to study etiquette and you will be amazed at the power you will gain in business.

Deborah O’Connor is a social strategist and founder and president of Successful Image LLC with offices in Columbia and Atlanta. She offers training and seminars on image management, workplace etiquette, and social skills necessary to succeed in life professionally and personally. Contact at:   [email protected]        www.successfulimage.biz