What kind of happiness are you chasing?

November 29, 2018

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By Brian Maynor

 

In the constant pursuit of happiness have we ever stopped and asked ourselves, what kind of happiness we’re after?

When we stop to think about it, there are two basic kinds of happiness:  happiness in the moment and happiness remembered.  While the two can go hand-in-hand, like time spent with family or friends where we are happy in the moment and remembering it, they don’t always, for example family vacations.

Too much family time can often result in stress, tension and the occasional blow-up making them not so much fun in the moment, but when we look back on them we tend to remember the good times and that brings us happiness.  Another example would be a weekend spent relaxing at home doing little to nothing productive.  It makes us happy in the moment, but it’s not something we’ll look back on and remember with fondness.  In fact, when we think back on it we can feel guilty about playing lazy.

It may seem like a minute distinction, but it makes a big difference in our pursuit of happiness.  After all, if we don’t know what kind of happiness we’re after we are wasting valuable time, effort and energy.

In case you’re not sure of which happiness you prefer, or tend to change your mind, here are some helpful thoughts:

1.   People who prefer to seek happiness in the moment subscribe to a carpe diem approach to life.  The present moment is all we have, so it is important to be happy now.  The future is never guaranteed, and life is short.

2.    Those who seek remembered happiness however; tend to have a variety of reasons ranging from a desire to experience happiness longer to using it as motivation to achieve giving a sense of productivity and pride.

3.    When we tend to think about happiness over a lifetime, most of us take a more philosophical view, assuming we will have memories of undiluted pleasure.  However, if we’re constantly putting off moments of happiness in the present we won’t have any moments to look back on and remember.  While we all have periods of time when we have to choose work over fun, we need to be mindful not to make it our norm.

The pursuit of happiness is so valuable it is enumerated as an inalienable right, and it doesn’t matter which type of happiness you prefer.  The important thing is to never stop chasing it and remember if we want to look back on our lives with happy memories then we have to make those memories in the present.

 

 

 

I’m always excited to hear from you, so please email your questions, quandaries and conundrums to [email protected].

 

About Brian Maynor

Brian Maynor has built a reputation as one of the leading style coaches in the Southeast and is quickly expanding his eponymous company, BRIAN MAYNOR and his FIND, FLATTER & FLAUNT line of image consulting services. A professional with a fresh, upbeat and down-to-earth personality and boundless creative energy, he works frequently with with local celebrities; Fortune 500 companies and nonprofit organizations; modeling agencies; fashion designers; production companies; record labels; media and individuals. A regular contributor to various fashion blogs and online communities, Brian Maynor is one of the most trusted and recognized style experts in the region, utilizing his education and training as a broadcast journalist to serve as a style lecturer, emcee, and commentator for over a decade. He has appeared at fashion shows, expos, and charity fundraisers, as well as events with big brands like Banana Republic, Ann Taylor, Chico’s and Macy’s. His approach is innovative, creative and fashion-forward, balancing fresh, modern styles with classic pieces to keep one’s look grounded. To learn more, visit http://www.brianmaynor.com.

 

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