Grandma’s Life Lessons

By Amy Coward

It’s hard for me to believe that I’m now a grandmother. The title is still relatively new but I have to say the role is quite fun and everything that people promised. It’s made me think about my own grandmother a lot lately. She was a pretty big part of my life when I was growing up. I spent lots of time at her house in the summers with my cousins and she stayed with us often as well. She lived to be 98, which I always found remarkable, and little did I realize the life lessons she was teaching me. It kind of puts some pressure on me to be really good at this. Here are just a few of her lessons.

1. Spend time with family. Grandma was always the host of the annual family reunion. Despite the fact the some people didn’t bring their fair share of food or some took home all the leftovers, Grandma thought it was important to get together. I try to make the 400-mile trip each year to give everyone a hug. I can’t say it’s an easy trip and everyone doesn’t make it, but somehow I think Grandma might be keeping score so I go.
2. Feed your spirit. My grandma went to church regularly and not just to services. She served on committees, organized church suppers and practically ran the place. I have not even begun to match her dedication in this regard. I attend services now and then and play hand bells a few times a year. I do know that when I go, I feel a little better about the world and feel comforted to know I’m not on this journey alone. So thanks, Grandma.
3. Listen to a story. Each day, my grandma would take 30 minutes to watch “her story” on television, her soap opera of the day. She would point to the television and whisper “sshhh” so we wouldn’t interrupt her. I have to say I love a good story. I have my own fair share of dramas that I follow (and binge on occasionally), and I can escape in a good book for days on end. Stories take me away from all the stress of the world and lately there seems to be an ample supply.
4. Enjoy nature. Grandma used to love to go fishing or to the beach or to the mountains. She knew there was nothing like listening to the water lapping on the side of a boat as you drift along or feeling the warmth of the sun on your face as the ocean rushes in. She loved the scenic views of a mountain ridge. I’m with Grandma here. When I am out in nature, I’m forced to truly unwind, recharge and disconnect (and we certainly have a lot to disconnect from.)
5. Each some junk food now and then. My grandma lived to age 98 and her favorite foods were hamburgers, fried chicken and cake donuts. Now she also ate healthy home-cooking at all those church suppers, but she proved that a little junk food is okay now and then. I’m certainly glad to hear this. Try as I may to follow the lean, clean diet most of the time, French Fries call my name from time to time as do sweets of any description. A cake donut? It’s been a while so I probably need to have one soon.
6. Go visit someone. When my grandma was well into her 80s, she used to say she was going to “visit the elderly and the shut-ins”. (We used to snicker because she wasn’t so young herself.) She knew how much it meant to someone who couldn’t get out of the house to have someone drop by for a visit. I need to be better at this. I get so absorbed in my own schedule that I seldom think about those who could really use a visitor. Maybe I’ll dust off a casserole recipe soon and take it to someone. It could be just what the doctor ordered.
7. Take a nap. I’m convinced the 20-minute power nap was my Grandma’s invention. She was certainly the master of it. “Just resting my eyes,” she would say as she snuck off to a quiet room. Luckily I inherited this and what a gift it is. You can time me almost to the minute – 20 minutes and I’m as good as new.
8. 8. Hit the flea market, rummage sale, garage or yard sale. Call it what you will, Grandma loved a treasure hunt and so do I. It’s the thrill of finding something you want or need and paying next to nothing for it. My whole family gets a kick out of it.
9. Drive down the middle of the road and practically dare oncoming drivers to make you move. Ahem, no, Grandma. This is one lesson we all need to ignore.

My grandmother has been gone more than 20 years and all of us in the family have lots of funny stories to tell about our adventures with her. But these life lessons remain. I am now a grandmother of four and I wonder what kind of lessons I will leave. I know have some work to do where Grandma’s list is concerned. I’m not as disciplined or selfless as she was, but I can work on that. I certainly hope to pass along some lessons that would make Grandma proud. And maybe there will be stories about my quirky nature to tell as well.

In the meantime, thanks Grandma. I’m giving your list my best shot and working on one of my own. I’m pretty sure my list will include beaches and stories and naps just like yours.

And definitely cake donuts.

Amy Coward is a public relations professional in Columbia, SC. When she is not managing the madness of event planning at Palmetto Health Foundation, she is writing, running and traveling.