We Really Do Need Each Other

September 2, 2021

By Jeff Becraft


In my address book for my email is a folder labeled: BROTHERS.

It is 9-10 guys whom I have known for about 40 years.  They are the guys who know the good, the bad, and the ugly of my life.  I hardly ever get to see these guys but they are there for me (and I for them) all the same.  During the deepest needs of my life, they have been there.  They have given me advice, they have prayed for me, they have encouraged me, and they have stood with me.  None of them has ever let me take an easy path or an easy way out.  They have always encouraged me to do the right thing.

These guys live in various parts of the country.  But there are local guys as well who are part of the GBU (good, bad, and ugly) group… they just haven’t known me as long. And then there is a much larger group of friends whom I share life with and they help to make life that much more meaningful.

The reality is… we need people in our lives.  People who know the good, the bad, and the ugly.  People we don’t have to pretend around.  They get to see all the laundry.  The greatest definition I have ever heard of intimacy is this: to be fully known and still delighted in.

There are times in life where we can feel like we are in a fog.  And those are times when we need other people who can grab hold of us and let us know it is just a fog… not the reality.

While in college, one of the guys who is in the BROTHERS folder suggested that a bunch of us go camping.  Which we did.  But he wound up not even going… he was interested in a girl and said he needed to stay back and study.  What in the world…

So the rest of the 25 of us head out… without a single tent.  Each of us just had a sleeping bag.

During the middle of the night you could hear and see that a massive storm was coming.  About a half dozen of us decided to abandon ship before the storm reached us.  The only problem was, we were out in boogah cheetah and there wasn’t the first light.  (This was before cell phones so there was no flashlight button to hit.)

It was pitch dark and I couldn’t see three feet in front of me as we traipsed through the woods.  Without being able to see anything, I had no idea where I was going.  (And this was before I was old and grumpy.)  The six of us were spread out single file.  About every 10 seconds or so, lightning would flash and I could just catch a reflection off of Brenda’s shirt (the girl I was interested in… and whom I eventually married).  When I saw Brenda’s shirt for a split second, I would then walk straight towards that… again in the pitch dark… until I saw the next flash of lightning, pick up Brenda’s shirt and walk in whatever direction that was.  If I had been by myself, I would never have made it back to the cars.

We really do need each other.

Make the most of this day!