October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month: help is close to home in Laurens County

October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month, a national observance first marked in 1987 that calls attention to abuse that often happens behind closed doors. It is a time to remember those whose lives have been lost to domestic violence, stand beside survivors and offer hope to those still living in fear.

Domestic violence can take many forms. It can be physical, emotional, verbal, sexual or financial, and it affects people of every age and every walk of life. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, about 1 in 4 women and 1 in 7 men will experience severe physical violence by an intimate partner in their lifetime.

Psychological abuse, commonly known as gaslighting, is another form that is often overlooked. Dawn Ardelt, director of the Laurens County Safe Home, said her staff sees it frequently. It happens when an abuser repeatedly lies, denies or twists events until a victim begins to doubt their own memory, judgment and even sanity.

The toll of domestic violence is heavy in South Carolina. According to the Violence Policy Center, the state ranked among the top 10 in the nation for the rate of women killed by men in 23 of the 25 years from 1996 through 2020. On Oct. 6, the statewide Silent Witness program honored the 40 South Carolinians who lost their lives to intimate partner violence in 2025.

In Laurens County, the front line of help is the Laurens County Safe Home. Founded in 1985, the nonprofit serves survivors in Laurens, Abbeville and Saluda counties. Its crisis hotline is answered around the clock, and it provides emergency shelter at a confidential location for victims and their children.

Staff members help survivors build a safety plan, guide them through the legal system and support clients who never stay in the shelter. Shelter residents can receive counseling, and staff can help survivors connect with programs that offer financial assistance. The Safe Home also offers education, workshops and support groups, with help available in English and Spanish.

“Leaving is often the most dangerous time for someone in an abusive relationship, so we never want anyone to feel they have to figure it out alone,” Ardelt said. “Whether someone needs a place to stay tonight or just someone to talk to about their options, our hotline is answered any hour of the day. You do not have to be ready to leave to call us.”

Many victims delay leaving an abusive home because they worry about a pet left behind. Service animals are welcome in the shelter. For other pets, the Safe Home has helped survivors find foster homes or boarding, depending on each situation.

Friends, neighbors and co-workers are often the first to notice something is wrong. Warning signs can include a partner who monitors someone’s phone or whereabouts, controls the money, cuts a person off from family and friends, or shows extreme jealousy. A person experiencing abuse may become withdrawn, cancel plans often or make excuses for injuries.

Laurens County Sheriff Don Reynolds encouraged residents to pay attention.

“Start conversations. Check on people. Support the organizations doing this work every day,” Reynolds said. “And if someone finds the courage to tell you they need help, listen and help them get help.”

The community can show its support at the Safe Home’s annual Bring One Wear One luncheon on Tuesday, Oct. 27, featuring survivor Brenna Lawrence as guest speaker. Tickets are $40 and can be reserved by calling 864-682-7270, ext. 4.

Where to find help

In an emergency, call 911.

Laurens County Safe Home 24-hour hotline: 864-682-7270, or toll-free at 866-598-5932.

National Domestic Violence Hotline: 800-799-7233, or text START to 88788.

Anyone concerned that an abuser may be monitoring their phone or computer should use a device the abuser cannot access, such as a library or work computer, when looking for help.